i woke this morning
with a tiny seed of disappointment
sitting on my shoulder-
walking into the kitchen
it edged its way into my soul
and now waits for the rain.

i wonder if this means
that i'm the one who wanted it-
i'm the one that concentrated on
planting the plant
that would grow
to destroy me-
take out my own rooted structure.

i woke this morning
to your kind words
and your absence.
there's a sense of hollowness in that
a moment of disappointment
because the anticipation
faded out-
left its keys
but no note to let me know
how it got out.

there's no promise in your eyes
no hope for the future of buildings
and bridges
just a sly wink
and an ever calculated expression.

i want you more than that-
more than the rain
that falls on this city
and leaves me wet
but not broken hearted.